Perfectionism and Growing In Grace

Wow, I could write so much about the following.  But then, I’d begin to feel some perfectionism creeping in.  =)

I’m becoming more and more convinced that satan can make us give up on Christianity by making us strive in our desire to be more like Christ…

We, desperately, need to extend grace to ourselves as well as to others…

It can be really difficult to truly forgive others if we can’t forgive ourselves or God.

Boy, I’m just SO thankful for the Apostle Paul’s life and experiences…

The one who sows to please his flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; but the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.  Let us not grow weary in well-doing, for in due time we will reap a harvest, if we do not give up.  Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to the family of faith.…
Galatians 6:8-10

The Law came in so that the transgression would increase; but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more,
Romans 5:20

For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves:  it is the gift of God:  Not of works, lest any man should boast.
Ephesians 2:8-9

For I do not understand my own actions.  For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.  Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good.  So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.  For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh.  For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.  For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.  Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.  So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand.  For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.  Wretched man that I am!  Who will deliver me from this body of death?  Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!  So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.
Romans 7:15-25

I hope the following is clear and simple enough to express what I’m trying to say…=)

First I want to say that we need to realize that when God’s pointing out something in our lives that we often feel condemnation for it.  But, what God’s really up to is freeing us from whatever He knows is weighing down our spirits.  In His love for us, He’s being a faithful Father.  And, that, we can rejoice in.

With that said, I want to share a personal matter that may be helpful to many – I have just now seen this issue more clearly in myself, again.

I never like to tell folks to dwell on their past since God tells us to press onto the future while forgetting the past, but sometimes knowing our past can help us resolve lingering spiritual issues that free us from the past.

I can be a perfectionist.  God’s helping me with this issue.  I believe being a perfectionist comes from a victim mentality, some form of self-pity, from being compared to others, from never feeling good enough, never living up to others’ expectations, from having chronic health issues, from feeling inadequate, shame, or like I’m a burden.  I can feel like I’m always trying to prove my worth to others.  I’m sure satan is ever ready to bring these thoughts to our remembrance.

As I grow in the Lord, at times, I can feel like I want to do everything perfectly.  I don’t like it when I mess up in my walk with Jesus or when I still react to others in my old ways.  It can bother me for a while, sometimes.  What I also noted about messing up is that it can bother me so much that I can be tempted to feel like, “Oh well, what’s the use.  I’m never going to be able to overcome these strongholds so why try.”

That’s about the time I come to a fork in the road.  Am I really frustrated enough to want to give up Christianity?  Or, do I receive God’s grace for my failure, stop my striving and proving my worth, and ask His help to keep going, to keep me motivated to continue on with renewing my mind in Christ.  Do I let my desire to be free from generational strongholds fill me with such strife that it makes me weary and resentful, or do I let God’s grace cover those irritating items and release Him to work them out of me in His time knowing He loves me in the meantime?

Thankfully, God’s always had me continue on with Him.  He’s always allowed me to forgive myself and to move on.  He’s always helped me to not grow weary in well doing.  In fact, whenever I feel myself growing weary in my Christian walk, God helps me recognize my striving and brings His grace to my mind and heart as if to say, “I know your efforts to be more like My Son.  But, your own efforts only lead to strife and weariness.  So please let go of your strife and walk in My forgiveness and timing for your growth.  Let My grace fill you with the peace that passes understanding right now.”

If you sense that, perhaps by no fault of your own, you’ve become a perfectionist, let God love you into His grace.  Know that apart from Christ we can do nothing.  Jesus is the One Who helps us grow. He’s the One Who forgives us and teaches us to forgive ourselves when we can’t live up to the image we may have formed for ourselves.  He can set us free from serving that idol with His mercy and grace that are new every morning.

Maybe someone needed to hear this today – I did.  I was going to write about something totally different today, but it seemed like the Lord was saying to write the above instead.

I love you all.

God bless,

Mark